”People are strange!”

People are strange.
My hostfamily i was/am with how are great. and I thought I was polite and nice and good towards them. but Obviously I wasnt. or am not. or I am just rude in general and a few people overlook that because they know who I am underneath. I dont know.
I get along well with people in general, Or so I thought until today. I know tho that the man in the house doesnt really want me to leave, but he respects and accepts his ladys desicion. Good of him, I would do the same.

Personality clash.

hmm a synonym of clash is war.
but I think ’incompatible’ is a better way of saying it.

2 personalities that just wont go together…
but if that was so I should have noticed?
Or maybe I am just very ignorant to everything?

I think too much, that is correct, but how can I help/stop doing that? I would like to. A friend of mine sometimes accuses me of not having a brain, but that can not be true if I think too much…
I’ll get up really early (5:55 ish) tomorrow, so I may be in pakuranga before anyone’s awake… I’ll just spend an hour online if its open then.. yeah thats a good idea… maybe they let me connect the LT…

I’ll watch the end of ”Basil, The great mouse detective”… then maybe mary poppins… if she can not make me happy I am doomed… for real…

Stephen, Em and Lustforlike are the only reasons I have not rebooked my ticket already… I got a bad start, a bad continuing.. and whats next? an even worse continuing or a good one? Impossible to know beforehand maybe…

I am happy Logans family welcomed me like they did, If they hadnt I would have gone to wellington I guess… skipped shcool and just gone there and then gone home… but since Stephen is such a nice guy I cant do that either, I gotta finish my course and score well on the test. try to find an environment in which I can focus so I can learn the words I should have already learned. if its not the traffic its my thoughts making my mind cloudy. cant focus at the Ef school either, too much chattering or typing. Depending on where one is.

I also need to learn to see when I change tempus when I am writing, and learn to avoid it. No clue how to tho? have you got any ideas?

Tomorrow I will be happy.. sunday I will probably be sad… Monday… depends… Hopefully happy… Perhaps I will even get a hug from someone? *misses hugs* that if nothing else will make me happy… if in the right moment and place it’ll make me happy for a week or two….. yeah… think about that one…

its getting darker… its not dark yet tho… cant sleep or even think of sleeping unless its dark outside…. could read my book but I have a headache so I dont feel like doing that..

the ’.’ must be the most used key on my keyboard…. hehe..

please save me from this mood… I dont want to be sad.. I really dont like being sad… who does anyway… I guess those stuck in depression have accepted the sadness… I had earlier.. but I got out of it… and now I hate being sad….

I am not as egocentric as I might sound. I am quite generous and it doesnt always have to do with me wanting something in return.

And then.

I say that when I dont know what will happen, but when I want something to. I want to buy a longmans dictionary. I will do that. If I read and throw away the books I brought it will fit. somewhere.

I am surprised my hostfamily called lynette and that they didnt talk to me… thats strange.. I guess I was just too much of a messy person, or too fond of her dog.. or something… I dont know… I wonder if Lynette does.. I’ll ask her later..

I am actually typing just whats on my mind.. I do not wish to offend anyone or anything.. these are just my thoughts about things.. might phrase something incorrectly unintentionally. 21:51 …

Time passes very slowly when you’re utterly bored…

LOL … Phone rings at 20:52. .. she said they go to bed close to 20:30.. perhaps it different on fridays… she replied anyway.. after just 2 signals.. Maybe she’s waiting upstairs for the sound of me showering, but there wont be one. I’ll shower in pakuranga where I can shower and get clean..

yeah.. she removed the jigsaw and the puzzles from my room, afraid I’d steal them maybe… I have no idea.. I am sure I did nothing wrong.. the worst thing.. or maybe the best? would be for lynette to give up and put me in an appartment.. I think.. But that’d cost me more money I think… if it’d cost me less I’ll ask for it.. cause I’m a bit tired of movin around…… yep….
if in an appartment I’ll be close to the city too where there’s cheap and good internet…

yey 21:00 … late enough to get ready for bed….

It feels like I have typed 8-9 pages… but its really just 1 and a half page. so its not that much…
Brush teeth, clean up without using hot water, change clother, put on dvd, turn out the light, crawl into bed, watch movie, get sleepy, turn off puter, sleep.
Decent enough?
Worked yesterday.

Seeyas *hugs to all willing*
*hugs to one who might be as well*
(I think you know who you are)

Tom Pillibi is a silly song! (Jaqueline Boyer)